If you want to know if you're in a Codependent relationship, you must first know what does codependent means?

Even if you've never heard of the word, by looking at it, I've got a feeling you kinda know what it means.

In a nut shell, it's the opposite of being independent.

According to the Wikipedia:

Codependency is a type of dysfunctional helping relationship where one person supports or enables another person's drug addiction, alcoholism, gambling addiction, poor mental health, immaturity, irresponsibility, or under-achievement. Among the core characteristics of codependency, the most common theme is an excessive reliance on other people for approval and a sense of identity.

However, you may think you're an independent woman and how could you possibly be in a co dependent relationship?

I hate to break the truth to you but the truth is most of us are in co dependent relationships and we don't even know it!

Women have been suppressed for such a long time and we've been conditioned to think that THIS is normal.

But there's nothing normal about it. In fact, the opposite is true, it makes us pscyho and hard to get along because we've been suppressed.

Here're the basic tell tail signs that you're in a codependent relationship.

You've a need to be:

  • right
  • liked
  • loved
  • perfect
  • validated
  • in a relationship
The fear of:
  • success
  • fear
  • being wrong
  • making the wrong decision
  • speaking your truth
  • judgements

If you can identify with any of these traits, I've good news and bad news for you.

The good news is that - it's not your fault and you can change it.

The bad news is that - if you don't do anything about it that's going to be your life by default.

How can you drop codependency?

Before I go on, I must warn you that when you start taking a stand for yourself be sure that people will be pissed or get uncomfortable or you must lose a few friends.

It's normal and it's ok - don't feel guilty about keeping your boundaries neat and tidy.


1. Identity all the relationships that are toxic.

Toxic relationships are draining the energy and sucking the life out of you - one that doesn't make you feel like you're loved or you can't be yourself.

You don't have to unfriend these people but rather keep your distance away so that you avoid being made use of.

2. Honour your YES and NO.

Learn to say what you really mean. Say yes when you really mean yes and no when you really mean no. It's not your job to make sure people are happy.

It may be uncomfortable at first. You may even feel like dying. I know how it feels. When I was challenged to speak my truth sometime last year, I fell sick for 2 weeks after speaking up for myself.

Feel the fear and do it anyway. It'll soon become a natural habit - you'll be a pro at this in no time.


Taking care of yourself doesn't mean just going on a shopping spree or treating yourself to a day at the spa.

Self care is about taking time to get to know WHO YOUR REALLY are.

Do you know what are your deepest fears and desires?

See.... many women are so busy making sure everyone needs are met except their and they just exist.

A good way to start is by journalling. 

Write down all your thoughts and ask yourself questions.

You can start with this question....

"Am I really happy with my life right now?"

If your answer is YES... why yes?

If your answer is NO... why NO?

I know it may sound weird to you at first but you're not going crazy when you talk to yourself.

You need to become your own BFF.

When you know who you truly are and how to LOVE you, you start to attract people who will treat you with utmost love and respect.

Think about this... If you don't love you, why should others?

It's time to become the woman you've always wanted to be!

©  Elyse-Anne.com 2017 | For the Woman who is Ready to Drop Codependency & Become the Woman She has Always Wanted to be!

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